So what does that look like in real life if you're about to tie the knot? Or, even if you've been at it for 10, 15 years? You have to know each other at the core of your gender identity. Men and women have very different and specific needs.

                                             

Do you know what the #1 need of a woman is? It is to know that she's significant, and that you  treasure her.

You're a wise man if you can speak into that every day because your spouse wants to know that she... is...valued. And you value your spouse ten different ways:

1. She needs to be number one. 
Your wife needs to feel that she is more important than your business or job, and especially more important than your mother, children, friends, sports, and hobbies.

2. She needs intimacy.
When your wife is stressed out and overwhelmed from putting out fires all day while trying to meet that important deadline, she needs to know that you are willing to share an intimate moment of comfort without demanding explanations or giving lectures. In other words, don't fix her. Lend an ear, and let her process.

3. She needs you to be vulnerable. 
Open or unobstructed communication is hugely important to the female gender, and that you can be emotionally available for her.

4. She needs to be praised. 
Make it a habit to often acknowledge and praise her for her work accomplishments so she can feel like she's a valuable part of your life.

5. Let her be part of your team. 
Your wife needs to feel free to help you and contribute to the things that matter to you without fearing retaliation and anger.

6. She needs you to protect and defend her. 
Not just from physically harm, but from the criticism of others. She wants to know that you are for her, and has her back.

7. Make her feel like her opinion counts.
She needs to know that her opinion is so valuable about your work or business that you will discuss decisions with her, and act only after carefully evaluating her advice.

8. Share your life with her. 
She needs to connect with you in a special way, so create margin so she can share her life with you in every area -- home, family, work, and outside interests. Don't shut her out.

9. Be a man of character and integrity. 
She needs you to be the kind of man her son can follow and her daughter would want to marry.

10. Hold her often. 
She needs physical affection, to be tenderly held, just to be near you, apart from times of sexual intimacy.